The Thing Missing From My Life

The Things Missing from My Life

When I was younger,
Say a few years ago,
When smart phones did not rule my generation.
I used to get so annoyed ever morning as I woke up to the sound of
People laughing loudly during yoga in the neighbourhood.
If not my loud neighbors, then my dog, pawpy who
Wouldn't keep it down, when birds chirped in our garden.
I now always wake up to the sound of phone ringing.
I  do not rush to the kitchen to get the times to
Finish  sudoku before my brother gets to it.
I do not look out from the balcony and wave at my neighbour.
I do not spend time staring at the stars at night while listening
To vanilla twilight.
Honestly, I can go and on about all the things I loved
That's I've stopped doing now.
So I guess it's true.
As my mother always tell me, I am a grown up now.
A seventeen years old grown up.
And after a series of regretful moments in my life,
I've come to the realization  that life is not about getting all the
Things you want from the supermarket
Or having the guys you always had a crush on, like you back.
And it is So Not always about winning.
Turns out
Life has always been about all the small things
That exist around us,
That happen around us
Things that makes us wonder,
And pause
And things that keeps us moving forward
When I got up from my bed today
After crying myself to sleep last night,
"How stupid I was", I realize
I went out to the balcony and saw my neighbour playing
With her new born baby daughter.
I smiled.
And as I cried out to my mother for my morning coffee,
I saw today's daily, folded with a riNgs of coffee in the corner.
I picked it up and turned to page 12 for sudoku,
Only to find it completed already, with my brothers initial
In the bottom corner ;R
Life is so damn simple again. No one told me that all those years I spent doing nothing but something
Would all be a very beautiful memory.
I wonder why  I spent so much time
In my room, alone, thinking about people who
May or May not about my existence,
About means people
About dream people
And about a happy life.
All I had to was live it.